Thursday, April 14, 2016

Codependence Looking In

This is something I wrote at my kids' soccer practice.  So much of my marriage has been dealing with my husband's codependency, which goes oh so well with his mother's narcissism.  It just felt like something I needed to write, so I did.


Always needing reassurance
Never feeling complete 
by yourself.  
Confidence is having 
someone by your side
to make decisions for you.
Love for you was
meeting an expectation.  
You didn't get 
the nurturing every
child deserves,
and now as an adult
that child stares back 
from your eyes.
No one can help you
when you won't see
your own reflection.
The lonely child inside you
forever waits for
loving acceptance.

Needing to know
what's happening
at all times.
Never happy
unless you're in charge.
Trust is telling
other people what to do.
If the ones
you loved the most
were in a glass cage
of your making
then you would feel
complete.
What others see
as controlling
is what you see
as showing love.
The mirror is broken.